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On Feeling Alone When Surrounded By Others

7 Aug

I think it happens when we feel isolated from ourselves. Like when we feel disconnected from our personal senses of comfort and knowledge or when our hearts/bodies/minds aren’t in line with each other.

How to prevent this feeling from happening:

  1. Journal entries
  2. Writing of any kind
  3. Exercise
  4. Art
  5. Reading memoirs of other people with similar experiences
  6. Daily meditation
  7. Cooking

How to deal with it in the moment:

  1. Meditation-style breathing
  2. Focus on one person, object, idea until you feel re-centered
  3. Think about what you can do with your physical body to make it more in tune with your heart and your surroundings – change your body position (stand up or sit down), drink water, have a healthy snack, give someone a hug, untense your shoulders, change your breathing pattern.
  4. Tell someone next to you about what you’re feeling

Peace.

29 Dec

I read a blurb about this idea the other day, and it’s really stuck with me and I’m not sure why I hadn’t realized it before: using “the starving kids in Africa” as a reason for why we should appreciate what we have, or eat all the food we’re given, or whatever, is incredibly disrespectful.

It reduces an entire continent to one type of person, when, in reality, the variety of people and ways of living are endless. Africa is a beautiful continent full of beautiful, strong, healthy, well-educated people. That’s not to say there aren’t significant problems in certain areas, and it would do no good to ignore those issues. But I still believe that reducing an entire continent to “those skinny brown kids” doesn’t do those people justice. The people who fight every day to succeed, whatever that means to them.

I support them in their life journeys, and believe in what they have to give this world.

Quick hit: Riot Grrrl Manifesto

6 Dec

by Kathleen Hanna/Bikini Kill

BECAUSE us girls crave records and books and fanzines that speak to US that WE feel included in and can understand in our own ways.

BECAUSE we wanna make it easier for girls to see/hear each other’s work so that we can share strategies and criticize-applaud each other.
BECAUSE we must take over the means of production in order to create our own moanings.

BECAUSE viewing our work as being connected to our girlfriends-politics-real lives is essential if we are gonna figure out how we are doing impacts, reflects, perpetuates, or DISRUPTS the status quo.

BECAUSE we recognize fantasies of Instant Macho Gun Revolution as impractical lies meant to keep us simply dreaming instead of becoming our dreams AND THUS seek to create revolution in our own lives every single day by envisioning and creating alternatives to the bullshit christian capitalist way of doing things.

BECAUSE we want and need to encourage and be encouraged in the face of all our own insecurities, in the face of beergutboyrock that tells us we can’t play our instruments, in the face of “authorities” who say our bands/zines/etc are the worst in the US and

BECAUSE we don’t wanna assimilate to someone else’s (boy) standards of what is or isn’t.

BECAUSE we are unwilling to falter under claims that we are reactionary “reverse sexists” AND NOT THE TRUEPUNKROCKSOULCRUSADERS THAT WE KNOW we really are.

BECAUSE we know that life is much more than physical survival and are patently aware that the punk rock “you can do anything” idea is crucial to the coming angry grrrl rock revolution which seeks to save the psychic and cultural lives of girls and women everywhere, according to their own terms, not ours.

BECAUSE we are interested in creating non-heirarchical ways of being AND making music, friends, and scenes based on communication + understanding, instead of competition + good/bad categorizations.

BECAUSE doing/reading/seeing/hearing cool things that validate and challenge us can help us gain the strength and sense of community that we need in order to figure out how bullshit like racism, able-bodieism, ageism, speciesism, classism, thinism, sexism, anti-semitism and heterosexism figures in our own lives.
BECAUSE we see fostering and supporting girl scenes and girl artists of all kinds as integral to this process.

BECAUSE we hate capitalism in all its forms and see our main goal as sharing information and staying alive, instead of making profits of being cool according to traditional standards.

BECAUSE we are angry at a society that tells us Girl = Dumb, Girl = Bad, Girl = Weak.

BECAUSE we are unwilling to let our real and valid anger be diffused and/or turned against us via the internalization of sexism as witnessed in girl/girl jealousism and self defeating girltype behaviors.

BECAUSE I believe with my wholeheartmindbody that girls constitute a revolutionary soul force that can, and will change the world for real.

Quick hit: GWSS reading

2 Nov

“Because emotional intimacy is about self-disclosure and revealing oneself to others, when people are intimate with each other, they open themselves to vulnerability. In the process of becoming intimate, one person shares feelings and information about her-/himself, and then the other person (if that person want to maintain and develop intimacy) responds by sharing too. In turn each gives away little pieces of her-/himself, and, in return, mutual trust, understanding, and friendship develop. Given the baggage of gender, however, what can happen is that one person does more of the giving away, and the other reveals less; one opens up to being vulnerable, and the other maintains personal power. The first person also takes on the role of helping the other share, drawing that person out, translating ordinary messages for their hidden emotional meanings, and investing greater amounts of energy into interpersonal communication. The first person has taken the role prescribed by femininity and the latter the role that masculinity endorses. The important point here is that intimacy is about power. Men who take on masculine scripts tend to be less able to open themselves up because of anxiety associated with being vulnerable and potentially losing personal power.”

– Women’s Voices, Feminist Visions by Susan Shaw and Janet Lee

Just read it

21 Sep

I don’t have time for commentary, so just trust me that you should read this.

http://www.thebody.com/content/art58093.html

quick hit

1 Sep

Dear people who whistle, cat call, stare, grope, grab, “accidentally” brush by, start grinding on me without asking, assault, violate, and/or rape:

Just because you can see it doesn’t mean it’s yours. This is a lesson we’ve been taught since infancy. So don’t think that just because I’m standing in front of you means that all of a sudden I’m yours. I’m not. I’m mine. So fuck off.

Quick hit

19 Aug

Please, for the love of whatever you find holy or important, don’t use the words “pro-life” to describe people who oppose a woman’s right to choose. They are not pro-life, they are anti-choice. Unsafe abortion kill tens of thousands of women every year, and people who advocate anti-choice policy put the well-being of women at risk.

In the future, please use the phrase “anti-choice” to describe someone who opposes a woman’s right to make choices for her family, body, and life.